Friday, June 24, 2011

Hold it Right There! By: Grandma Jeddah

According to the sahaba, 'The Messenger of Allah used to talk little and everything was expressed in this brief talk. In his speech, there was no defect of excess or brevity. The words came one after another like pearls. Whoever heard them remembered them. He was the sweetest in talk among his companions. He used to keep silent for long and not talk without necessity. (Shamaa-il Tirmidhi)

When correcting your child, say what you want to say as briefly as possible. Rather than emphasize repeatedly what you want your child to do, say it once, giving the alternatives or consequences. Children get bored with our voices sometimes—well, maybe most of the time—when we’re correcting them.  If your child chooses not to do as you ask, give him his penalty and be finished with it.  Talking leads to debating and debating can lead to you getting more upset with your child.  Avoid it.
Remaining silent can also be useful as a discipline technique itself.  When you let your child know that you don’t have anything to say to him until he has done as you’ve asked—obedience is usually close behind.  Your child dislikes when he’s not being listened to.  Use it to your advantage.

This is an excerpt from Grandma Jeddah’s e-Book: Discipline without Disrespecting: Discover the Hidden Secrets of How to Effectively Discipline Your Muslim Child—And Keep Your Peace of Mind While at It.  To order her e-Book or receive her free newsletter, visit her at

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