Excerpt From--
MOM
I’m STRESSED!
Stress Help for
Muslim Teens and Youth
By Grandma Jeddah
I Feel Angry
Your teacher just gave you a “D” on your
history report! You know you deserved a better grade, and now you feel like
telling her off.
It’s not easy controlling your emotions
at times like this. But the reward for being patient and finding more positive
and Islamic ways of expressing your frustrations is well worth the effort.
There is great benefit in striving to be known as one who has patience. This
can only be accomplished by developing a consistent record of being patient
during hardship and trials.
There are many sites on the internet that
you can read which will give suggestions on how to be more assertive when you
feel you’ve been mistreated. Be sure to look them up after your reading. When
you have acceptable ways of expressing your dissatisfaction, you won’t have to
rely on your inappropriate expressions.
Here are encouraging words from Quran and
hadith on how to manage moments of anger. You will also discover the many
rewards and benefits of trying your best to be patient when someone does
something to you that gets you fuming.
1.
Two men disputed with each other in the presence of the Messenger
of Allah and the nose of one of them became swollen because of extreme anger.
The Messenger of Allah (saw) said, “I know of some words that if he said them,
what he feels will go away, [the words are] I seek refuge with Allah from the
cursed Satan.' ''
(Bukhari)
2.
Narrated
Abu Hurairah: The Prophet (saw) counseled a man who asked for his advice and
told him three times “Don’t get angry.” (Bukhari) According to scholars,
this means don’t act upon your anger, as everyone gets angry.
3.
According to hadith, The Prophet (saw) said: When one of you
becomes angry while standing, he should sit down. If the anger leaves him, well
and good; otherwise he should lie down. (Abu Dawud)
4.
Narrated
Abu Musa “Some people asked the Prophet (saw), “Whose Islam is the best?
i.e. (who is a very good Muslim?) He replied, “One who avoids harming the
Muslims with his tongue and hands. (Bukhari) Know that you might be
Accountable on the Day of Judgment for
the way in which you treat others.
5.
According to hadith, The Prophet (saw) said that Allah has said: “O
son of Adam! If you remained patient restraining yourself and expecting my
reward at the initial shock, I will not be happy without rewarding you with Jannah.”
6.
We all desire companionship at some time or another. We are also
sometimes in need of others’ assistance. In Quran 2:153 Our Lord informs us:
“Allah is with the patient.” What greater companion can one have? People sometimes let us down. They may fail
us and at times not have the means or ability to help us. Allah, on the other hand, is completely
Self-Sufficient. What a blessing to have
Allah as our Companion, Maintainer and Provider.
7.
The Creator of the heavens and the earth has given us a formula for
finding solutions to our tribulations. And part of the solution is having
patience. Allah says in Quran 2:45: “And seek help through patience and
prayer.”
When you feel you’re at your wits end
with your parents’ demands your friend’s rude and hurtful remarks, seek help
for your troubles with patience and prayer.
8.
To be
loved is a warm and comfortable feeling. But what about the enormous blessing
of being loved by Allah, Glory be to Him the Most High! Quran 3:146 says,
“And Allah loves the patient." What an honor . . . to be loved by The
Most High! Another beautiful hadith about Allah’s love goes as follows:
The Prophet (saw) said: “When Allah,
Glory be to Him the Most High, loves someone, He calls Jibreel and says, (Oh
Jibreel!) Verily, I love such and such a person, so love him!)’ ”
And Allah names that person and then Jibreel loves that person. Then Jibreel
calls out to all the angels of the heavens and he says, “Allah loves so and so,
so love him!” And so all the angels love him. And then Allah places pleasure in
the hearts of the people towards this person!”
According to hadith, The Prophet
(saw) said, “. . . no one is granted a
gift better and more comprehensive than patience." (Bukhari and Muslim)
(To be continued, insha'Allah)
Grandma Jeddah is the mother of 11 children and 13 grandchildren. She has taught hundreds of students for over 30 years at an Islamic school in Los Angeles, California.She is the author of, Discipline without Disrespecting: Discover the Hidden Secrets of How to Effectively Discipline Your Muslim Child--And Keep Your Peace of Mind while at It. Order her e-books at: http://www.grandmajeddah.com/
