The Boy who Barked
By
Grandma Jeddah
“Bark, bark” his voice echoed through the classroom. A minute’s pause, and again, “Bark,
bark.” The first grader scribbled down
the answers to his math problems on the lined paper in front of him. The sounds surging from his throat were a
familiar companion, but not a welcome one for his teacher or classmates.
“Shut up!” said one boy across the room.
“I can’t concentrate,” said another.
“Teacher, can you tell him to stop making that noise?”
“Amir, stop that noise or sit outside the classroom to do your
work,” demanded the teacher.
Amir has Tourettes Syndrome, a neurological disorder generally
first noticed in children around ages 7 through 10 years old.
Tourettes causes a variety of vocal or muscular twitches called
“tics.” Some of the most common forms of tics are constant repetitive eye
blinking, vocal sounds, facial twitches, head jerking, sniffing objects,
touching objects, jumping, bending, shrugging and twisting. Vocal tics can involve throat clearing,
grunting and barking sounds. At its
extreme, Tourettes can result in physical harm in which the child may punch
himself or even swear; however, this is rare.
The disorder occurs 3 to 4 times more often in boys than girls.
If you have a child with Tourettes Syndrome, start out the new
school year with a better understanding of how to manage your child’s behavior
optimally. Here are some points you want to keep in mind whether you home
school or send your child away to school.
Tics Wax and Wane Intermittently
Although your child’s tics may appear voluntary or purposeful, they
are not. The urge is similar to the need to sneeze, blink your eyes or scratch
an itch. Your child’s tics may come and go from time to time. A period of head jerks or barks may last
several weeks, several months or over a year. Then, suddenly, tics can decrease
or even appear to completely go away at periods. Usually they return within a three month
period. When your child resumes his tics after a lull, you might misinterpret his
renewed repetitive sounds and movements as stubborn rebelliousness. This is
because you have seen him stop performing the tic for an extensive period. So
you may believe he can stop at will. You might even accuse him of faking his
behavior and order him to stop. To satisfy your demands, your child may try to suppress
his strong urge to act on his tic. Unfortunately,
this very act of suppression results in a buildup of tension that causes a more
severe urge to release the tic.
Your child’s tics can also depend on the circumstances in his life
at the time. His tics often get worse
when he is worried or excited. They subside during periods of relaxation or
focused activities.
Tics
can lead to unwarranted punishment
One important thing you want to keep in mind with your child is
that Tourettes can be a cause for him receiving unwarranted punishment or reprimands. Brad Cohen, a teacher and author who suffers from Tourettes Syndrome describes
a memorable account in his book, Front of the Class: How Tourettes Syndrome Made me the Teacher I Never Had. He tells of an episode during his childhood
in which he was seated in the back of his father’s car as his father maneuvered
at the wheel. Brad had developed several
annoying ticks; among them was the irritating tendency to repeatedly bump his
knee against the car door. His explanation to his dad that he couldn’t help
acting on his impulses was getting nowhere.
Fed up with having to repeatedly tell his son to stop, Brad’s father
wacked him across the face to get him to stop the knee knocking. The shock of
being slapped stopped Brad’s ticks for a short while, but he eventually
returned to the knee thumping even though he feared the next smack to come.
Many children with
Tourettes have additional disruptive and troublesome behaviors that accompany
their disorder. Among them are ADHD/ADD
and obsessive compulsive disorder OCD.
Learning disabilities are also common among children with
Tourettes. Because your child with
Tourettes may exhibit such an array of atypical behavioral, it is wise for you to
learn positive discipline techniques that use rewards and parental affection to
encourage obedience. These procedures are more effective than methods that
emphasize belittling and physical punishment. They lead to better cooperation and
less defiance from children with Tourettes.
If you are not familiar with effective
discipline methods that avoid hitting, scolding and shaming, check out books
from the library or search online for information on effective discipline
methods for children, in particular children with disabilities. There is ample information out there. Persistence in learning is a key to developing
successful discipline techniques for your child with Tourettes. The more you read and put into practice what
you've learned, the more the techniques will become a part of your daily
routine, insha’Allah.
Although raising
your child with Tourettes may seem daunting at times, educating yourself about
your child’s disability can help ease the strain. Knowledge of his condition
will help you know what to expect as distinctive behavior. It will also
minimize unrealistic expectations you may have regarding his conduct. Educating yourself about Tourettes is crucial,
because such children can suffer from lingering emotional or psychological
scars when they live in an environment in which family members, friends, school
officials and others interact with them with little or no understanding of
their condition.
Inform
School Officials
If your child
attends school, distribute Tourettes fact sheets to school personnel he frequently
has contact with. Many people are unaware that the disorder exists; this
includes some educators, as well. Even once
you have alerted others about the condition, many people will continue to
consider your child’s odd behavior as misbehavior. Other than gentle frequent reminders, there’s
not much you can do to change someone’s opinion about an issue. Your patience at home can be the haven your
child needs to successfully handle his condition.
Remain
Patient
Having patience is a priceless quality when dealing with your child
who has Tourettes Syndrome. Being patient and tolerant can allow you to be
flexible rather than rigid when managing his behavior. This does not mean you
should become lax in your discipline methods.
It simply means you should realize your child has a condition that is
not normal, which makes it difficult for him to control himself at times. This is particularly so if he exhibits
extreme forms of ADHD or OCD.
Being consistent when
disciplining is important for effective control of your child. But knowing how to address the
misbehavior is important, as well. You
may have a no nonsense policy regarding your children shouting at you or calling
you names. Your 9-year-old child with Tourettes
and accompanying ADHD may have no
reservations at all calling you a name or using provoking words when he’s angry
with you. Whatever your penalty is for
his talking back to you, be it extra chores, no computer for an hour, or what
have you, enforce it. But realize that
part of his actions may be related to his Tourettes and ADHD, which can cause
him difficulty in controlling his impulses.
Rather than focus on making the punishment severe, emphasize
making the penalty consistent.
Raising a child with Tourettes Syndrome can truly be a balancing act
when determining how to manage inappropriate behavior.
Be supportive
The importance of
a supportive and informed family and community cannot be over emphasized when
dealing with your child who has Tourettes.
Support and understanding can give your child the confidence and skills he
needs to self manage his disability in a productive manner. It can also help
you affirm that some of your children’s behavior may not be misbehavior . . . it may merely be a disorder that must be
managed.
More
information on Tourettes Sydrome can be obtained from the following websites:
National
Tourette Syndrome Association (TSA)
National
Institute of Neurological Disorders and Strokes
Find more
help and management techniques for your child with disabilities such as autism,
ADD, mental retardation and more from Grandma Jeddah’s e-book: How to
Nurture, Manage, and Discipline Your Muslim Child with Special Needs
