"Yes" Can be Best
By
Grandma Jeddah
No one likes to hear “no.” We all like to have our way and
do as we wish. But of course life isn’t always that sweet. When possible, give
your child an affirmative answer to her requests. Many times “No” is the
easiest answer, not the best or only answer. Can I do my homework later? If it’s a Friday and there’s no school
tomorrow, why not let your child use a token from her star chart to excuse
herself from homework for a day.
There
are times when “No” means “No”. No way around it. During these occasions try to
soften the “No.”
Suhaila: Can
Jamillah spend the night?
Mother: Not
tonight, maybe another night.
You avoided giving a hard
“No.” You haven’t opened yourself up to a definite promise with a date or
specific time for the future, but you let your daughter down easy. Hope is
better than a hard “no” and who knows, maybe you’ll decide to let the friend
spend the night on some other occasion.
If your child wants a special dessert after dinner, rather
than “No” try “Yes.”
“ When you finish your vegetables, I’ll make banana bread.” If you are too tired to bake, you could fix
something simpler such as a smoothie, popcorn or fruit salad.
The point here is that parents shouldn't be so quick to say
“No” or discredit their child’s requests. Cooperating with your child in this
way shows your child that you are not her adversary. You want to work with her
to solve her issues--you're on her side. This is one way to make discipline
easier for both you and your child.
This is an excerpt from Grandma Jeddah’s e-Book: Discipline
without Disrespecting: Discover the Hidden Secrets of How to Effectively
Discipline Your Muslim Child—And Keep Your Peace of Mind While at It. To order her e-Book or receive her free
newsletter, visit her at: http://shop.grandmajeddah.com/ or http://www.grandmajeddah.com/subscribe-page.html
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