Sunday, July 10, 2011

Empathize to Minimize Discipline Problems

             You’re in line at the grocery store.  It’s a sweltering summer day. You feel drops of sweat drip down your forehead, along your scarf and down your chest beneath your long dress. You notice the grocery store clerk smile and greet the customer in front of you with “Thank you, have a nice day.”  You step up to the counter. She doesn’t say a word.  She follows through on your transaction and hands you your change and receipt.  As you turn to leave, you hear a kind voice saying “Hi, how are you?” to the customer who was behind you.
            When you get home, you tell the story to a close family member at home.  He brushes it off as oversensitivity.  You feel indignant, cheated. 
            That’s how your child feels when she comes to you with a problem and you brush it off as if it were nothing she should be concerned about.  Everyone is different.  What may cause anger in one person might be a harmless joke to another.  Even though your daughter’s distress at her younger brother getting into her personal box of collections is insignificant to you, that doesn’t mean that it should be unimportant to your child.
            Keep this important concept in mind when dealing with your child’s behavior.  Showing concern for your child’s problems can open the doors to communication.  This can lead to your child expressing her feelings in a more positive rather than vindictive manner.

This is an excerpt from Grandma Jeddah’s FREE e-Book: Discipline without Disrespecting: 8 Tips to Taming Your Muslim child's Temper.  To download your own personal copy of this  FREE e-Book or receive Grandma Jeddah's FREE newsletter, visit her at

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